(felt the need to put a title)
In a summary, 2009 was filled with both the good and the bad ok stating the obvious whatever. the good ranges from insane insane moments of feeling infinite to this really comfortable feeling of being satisfied with life; while the bad ranges from mild feelings of being sian to all out ranting & sobbing like an idiot to unbelievably dark thoughts that stem from emptiness and disenchantment.
this year i've been through the darkest period of my entire secondary school life. it was terribly ugly and my four years of dedication felt like a waste of time that led up to nothing in the end. but it slowly got More Ok as i got desensitised to the hypocrisy of bureaucracy (not entirely true I JUST LIKE HOW IT SOUNDS TOGETHER OK). however I STILL HATE THAT BITCH. MAJORLY. BITCH. HERE'S THE FIRST FUCK YOU OF 2010.
whistles. moving on.
depressing bit #2 was debates. yijin and i had our last jgs, blew it but it also very surprisingly brought me my solitary shiny accolade in my entire debates career, my only consolation that Weilin, Sometimes You Don't Suck That Badly. but jere left took everything i loved with him and xuan came and everything started unravelling so terribly that it can't be fixed and right now, my neck's cramped up from all that turning back and making myself remember how it was like Before so that i'd keep going. i'm all out of faith and imho, debates is fucked. if i didn't care, i wouldn't be so aggrieved.
this year eldds got GWH and i'm proud beyond words, even if the Bitch did ruin it. becuzzz guys, we sure showed them non-believers.
thank you el, especially my level and the seniors because you've made my life so much brighter.
on a more positive note,
I LOVE ICHIANS, FOR NOW AND FOREVER.
i can't believe that in a few days time i'd be going back to school and into another class, i simply cannot imagine life without my beloved ichians. i think i've had more Laugh Until Stomach Damn Pain moments in 4i than in my entire life and every single one of you are irreplacable in my life.
from 3i, i remember playing in the rain stomping in puddles then drying our feet in class. i remember being one of the lucky few in the first few rows that slept while jiangli lectured in the middle of the classroom. i remember the tension during LA lessons and suppressed laughter. i remember gamelan i remember lit lessons and most of all i remember Vietnam.
from 4i, i remember being That Band and taking retarded band shots. i remember pretending we were all asleep slumped on our tables lights switched off when btan walked in. i remember soccer frisbee badminton (nq + wl + pe = fail) and all its hilarity. i remember chatting in big groups i remember having hthts.i remember all the CRAZY HIGHNESS in between lessons doing things so crazy i can't even remember it! i remember eating sleeping gossiping during bio self mutilation during history i remember all the cherie yijin weilin studying sessions and most of all i remember our 2 chalets during the holidays.
i don't know why but right now, i cant look at the big picture i'm zooming in all the little fantastic moments. thank you ichians, for showing me life in technicolour. thank you clique for being there for being you and being so different but so alike in our awesomeness. i hope we will stay together next year ok.
thank you all of my friends too who are not in the above two categories, i love you all from the bottom of my heart. i'm sure you guys individually know how important you all are to me (: i shall not name for fear of missing important people out! those whom i've known for 4 years, thank you for sticking by me, you guys have really seen and helped me grow. thank you for listening, the hugs, the laughter, the good times and the bad times.
i feel immensely blessed for having such awesome people in my life. REALLY REALLY U GUYS here's my heart on a platter please eat it because it's yours. <3>
this positivity calls for resolutions.
1. Brush my teeth at night
2. Record my life more often
3. Be organised right from the start of the year (!!! i make this resolution every. damn. year.)
4. Swim more & stop being such a lazy fatass & eat more healthily
5. Read more & record my reading & DONT STOP RECORDING HALFWAY
6. Spend less $$ on clothes and food, more on books and loved ones
7. Take life less seriously & stop being over sensitive
8. Don't sleep at all during lessons, do homework and study hard for tests (crosses fingers)
9. Venture out of my comfort zone more often
10. BE AWESOME
oh the last one is almost too easy.
more about the 2nd chalet, it was damn fun!! :D :D :D yj and i brought some el games to 4i chalet hahaha with the most hilarious consequences! grandma's footsteps + i accuse + ali baba and the 40 thieves (or 40 titties). played some drinking games but obviously we didn't get drunk (seems to be the norm at all other year 4 chalets) (except one HAHAHAHHA NO AIR NO AIR). cycled + swam spontaneously (surprised at myself i swear). chatted late into the night w changeunprisyj played guess the song at kopitiam, occasionally breaking into song.
oh how do i love thee, let me count thy ways. 4I IS LOVE.
this post is blardy long. if you made it this far, here's a secret to reward you. i kissed a girl and i liked it, the taste of her cherry chapstick !!!!!!
just kidding. love ya if you made it this far.