<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/plusone.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d15248238\x26blogName\x3dcosmic+idiot\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dBLACK\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttps://cosmic-idiot.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den_US\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://cosmic-idiot.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d-3742097048873066440', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>
Wednesday, December 20, 2006 11:25 PM

so i step out and switched on the balcony lights, as a romantic self loving start to a reflection. or to a blog post anyway. and then.

the lights tripped.

since MSN aparently doesnt work due to some STRANGE UNKNOWN reason. ive decided to blog and read fictionpress. but mostly read fictionpress. and ive realised. fictionpress authors who write romance go on and on and on and ON about eyes. its making ppl like me who dont have nice eyes jealous you know. *sniffs*

sighs. anyway. i wasnt really here to crap.
and for a moment, i forgot how to spell 'here' ._.

so. i was thinking as i was bathing. (bathing is a good time to think coz theres nothing else to put ur mind to except. well. bathing.) i have a lot a lot a lot a lot of fears. weird random fears that badly needs to be overcome. weird-O(!) fears like, fear of spelling error.

todays entree will be fear factor episode 1!
*theme song plays*

yesssss thats what im really scared of. there are waaayyy too many events that happened and things i did that made me seriously regret. and somehow when things get around and comes back to bite you in the ass (just when u think its settling in a darkdark place where crows dont fly), i get flustered and panic. and what happens when i panic? I MESS UP. my brains emigrate/immigrate and i follow my instinct. but my instinct is RUNNNNNNNNNNN! but even i know i cant run forever (pffft i can barely even run my stupid 2.4) so i deal with it, with my brains gone.

conclusion? i do brainless actions. sighs.

see. my big secret is out (well sortof). sometimes i dont talk much coz im scared of boring people.ESPECIALLY snrs. thats why i prefer to listen than talk. and i never get bored when ppl talk (except unfortunately teachers but i mean more like conversations yea.). this also leads to another fear but thats another story.

thats why being outspoken is hard for me in the way that i can be outspoken without being like HIGH and im sure its dangerous to the general public when u get high in lets say a shopping centre.

sighh. right. im kindof sick of bringing fears to light. so i shall shut up now.

oooos and i still cant believe that im gg to become a snr. O.o hurhur i remember last year i was thinking shit next year im the youngest IM NOT USED TO BEING THE YOUNGEST.